Cold Feet

I'd like to view myself as a fearless individual--one who stops at nothing to get what she wants.  One who follows her dreams to all extremes, as long as her dreams happen to be attainable.  One who lives by the words of Ambrose Redmoon, "COURAGE is not the absence of fear, but rather the judgment that something else is more important than fear."  Joining Americorps is that something to me.  Adventure is that something to me.  And above all, accomplishment is that something to me.


Amongst a hundred reasons for joining Americorps lies the desire deep within me to step into the lion's den.  To act fast and develop a thought process along the way.  To leap and further allow myself to pick up the pieces as I go.  However, the dwindling time prior to my departure is only weakening my thought process.  While fellow freshly-chosen crew members are able to express their excitement for arrival on campus, I'm finding myself feeling panicked and fearful.  I'd love to act as I've always imagined I would during this time--thirsting for my new adventure--but instead I feel weak as ever.


I will persevere!  However humbling this case of "cold feet" is, I will remember my reasons for joining.  I will step into the lion's den.  I will get whatever it is I am after.